Episode 62 - Grief and Therapy

As the 39th anniversary of my father's death approaches, I have been thinking about a conversation I had with my mother. She says that she asked me at age 11 or 12 if I wanted to see a therapist and I told her that I didn't.

I have no recollection of this conversation, but I explore the possibilities in this episode.

After doing a little research on what therapists do (and don't do), I don't know how well I would have received therapy.

Please share this episode with a therapist if you know any... I'd be very interested to hear their thoughts!

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com

Episode 61 - The Recipe of My Grief Recovery Process

I've had the opportunity to talk to a few people over the last few weeks about the loss of a parent.

In this episode I reflect on the 5 stages of grief as if the were applied in a cookbook written by my recipe.

If you are not familiar with the 5 stages of grief, they are:

  1. Denial
  2. Anger
  3. Barganing
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

These stages were develoed by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. You can get more information about them here: http://grief.com/the-five-stages-of-grief/

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com

Episode 60 - The Scab (and Scars) Left by Grief

I recently look at some scars that I had fir a while and realized that jus like grief, some wounds heal completely, some leave scqars and some scabs are ripped from wounds long before they heal... causing the healing process to start anew.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com

Episode 59 - Grief and Vulnerability

This week's episode is inspired by Natalie, a listener recently lost her mother and wanted to know especifically when I knew my live had been changed forever by the death of my father.

Simply put, I needed to open my heart the love others. The only way for me to do that, was to become vulnerable.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com

Episode 58 - Grief and Compassion

I have realized over the years that I have been judging how I thought people should react in certain situations based on my own personal grief experience.

Once I realized I was so wrong, it allowed me to see people and the circumstances in a totally different light.

Suzan Lori-Parks is an American playwright, novelist and screenwriter. To learn more about her and her work visit her website: http://www.suzanloriparks.com/

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com

Episode 57 - Why Is Grief A Taboo Subject?

I don't understand why we don't talk about our grief more. In full transparency, I don't actively discuss it outside of this podcast... and I don't even mention the fact that I have a podcast about grief to many folks.

Well this has changed for me. I have openly discussed my grief journey and the circumstances of my father's passing with a complete stranger, and it was a wonderful experience.

Grief is a suject that we can't keep bottled up, we must discuss it like anything else we bring up in conversation. Do you agree?

Send me an email: darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

To learn more about Isabel Allende, visit her website: https://www.isabelallende.com/

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 56 - Reflections of My Grief Journey

My writing comes not from the happy moments, but from struggle and grief.
 - Isabel Allende

his podcast is the direct result of losing my father at an early age. It has served as a form of therapy for me and each week I feel better as I release a lot of emotions that I've kept bottled up for so long.

One of the things that I have realized is that in order for me to truly appreciate where I am now in my grief recovery process, I must look back at where I started.

To learn more about Isabel Allende, visit her website: https://www.isabelallende.com/

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

 

Episode 55 - Grief and Dreams, An Interview with Joshua Black

So it finally happened... I conducted my FIRST EVER interview.

I had the opportunity to spend some times chatting with Joshua Black of the Grief Dreams podcast. Joshua is also working on his PhD in Psychology at Brock University in Ontario, Canada.

The main reason behind talking to Joshua was to get the sotry behind his grief and how he dealt with it and how others may has supported him through his grief recovery process. We did finally discuss his research as it relates to dreams that some people may have about their deceased loved ones/pets.

Contact Joshua at http://www.griefdreams.ca or on Instagram and twitter @griefdreams

Listen and subscribe to the Grief Dreams podcast:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/grief-dreams-podcast/id1121785602?mt=2

If you have lost someone who has lost a loved one and would like to discuss your grief recovery process, I want to talk to you about it. I 'll try to have an interview once a month. If you think someone might be a good fit, send me their contact info at darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 54 - Letting Go But Holding On During Grief

A lot has happened this week! I have been interviewed by the team of Grief Dreams Podcast - https://griefdreamspodcast.podbean.com/e/episode-18-grief-dreams-podcast/ . I had a great time discussing my grief recovery process with Joshua Black and Shawn Ram.

After delaying my announcement about new things coming to the podcast, I decided to tell the world that I'm interviewing people on this show... next week I'll share my interview / conversation with Joshua Black. We'll be talking about this grief journey, and how dreams inspired his research about grief related dreams. You don't want to miss it.

This week, I reflect on how I might con keep people alive (through memories) even though the physical person I used to me able to see, touch and interact with are no longer here... memories are very powerful things!

If you have been inspired to go great things because of or in spite of your grief (i.e. become a bereavement councilor, created a non-profit organization, written a book, etc.)  I want to talk to you about your grief recovery process. I 'll try to have an interview once a month. If you think someone might be a good fit, send me their contact info at darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 53 - Why Don't Some People Grieve?

The loss of loved ones affect my greatly. Why do some people seem not to grieve when the lose someone close to them. I've always wondered about this phenomenon.

If you have a way of easily coping with the loss of a loved one, please share how you do it.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 52 - Grief and the Common Cold

There was no episode February 1st... I was sick as I don't know what and didn't even have the energy to push the record button.

With that said, I've spent the last week contemplating how my recent bout with the common cold, or flu has caused me to reflect on my grief recovery process. Sometimes I don't think I give myself enough time to recover and I suffer longer than necessary.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 51 - Grief and Race

What's the relationship between race relations and my grief recovery process?

The life my grandfather lived is vastly different thanmine. He was born and raised in a Jim Crow segregated United States. I have vee afforded more opportunities than he has had give the passage of laws the were spearheaded by the spearheaded by Civil Rights movement.

The election/inauguration of Donald Trump as President in th U.S. causedsome to belief that he and more importantly his supporters want to not only role back recent legislation passed during the Obama administration, but also go much further.

His supporters believe he will restore America to its post World War II greatness as an economic power and a strong economy economy.

The statement "Make America Great Again" has stirred up much controversy, but what is it's true meaning. I believe it depends on your perceptions of a few thing... And for me it contains striking similarities to my grief recovery process

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 50 - The One Year Anniversary of Dealing With My Grief

What have I learned about my grief journey during the first year of this show?

WOW... It's been a year since I launched the podcast. I didn't know what I would talk about from week to week. I only knew that I had a lot of emotions that were bottled up inside and that I needed a release, and podcasting was my platform of choice.

I am grateful to everyone who has listened to any episode of this show and even more so to those that have listened to every episode.

For me the thing that I have learned is that grief imitates life... or is that the other way around.

Thanks for taking the time to listen to my show during your busy schedule, and if you think this show might resonate with others, please tell them about it!

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 49 - Social Media and Grief

 

Not everything needs to go on social media immediately!

After much deliberation, I've created a Facebook group - Click here to join.

I want the group to be a place where we can openly share what;s on our minds and how we feel/cope with our loss and the emotions surrounding them.

Speaking of social media, this week I discuss how I found out about my aunt's passing. Normally, I would receive a phone call, typically from my mother.

That didn't happen this time! I found out from a post on Facebook, about an hour after her passing.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Facebook: Dealing with My Grief

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 48 - My Resolution for Coping With Grief

I choose not let grief control my life.

Happy New year

Many are making resolutions - usually something to change their life in a positive manner - to stop smoking or drinking, to diet, or to get out to the gym.

Sometimes these resolutions fail because we choose to do something else with our time, or because of a lack of willpower.

I made a resolution a long time ago not to let my father's death control my life, When I it a tough patch in life, I think about positive traits my dad possessed and try to figure out how I can appy those to my life.

This weeks call to action: Think of a trait your loved one had and figure out how that has/can be positively applied to your life.

Again, Happy New Year! Let's make it a great one.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 47 - Grief and the Concept of Time

Time doesn't necessarily heal all wounds

As I think about how people plan to prioritize their time for the new year in the form of resolutions, I'm reminded by a listener that we can not do with time is heal our wounds caused by grief.

Healing from physical pain involves getting scabs that protect our wounds until the healing process is complete. Unfortunately when grieving, those scabs are reopened by our grief triggers, or things that people say or do... so the healing process is never really complete.

I also now question whether the amount of time we spent with our loved one affects the way we grieve. Let me know what you think.

Have a Happy New Year

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 46 - Grief and the Unanswered Question

Sometimes there just aren't good answers to our questions

Congrats to Sofia, Don and Paul - the winners of my contest giveaway. I'll be requesting your contact info shortly to send your gift cards.

I've been dealing with some personal issues lately that have kept me pretty preoccupied over the last couple of weeks. I've been so wrapped up and taken aback emotionally that I scrapped my original idea for this week just to get the past week off of my chest.

I struggle to find the answer to the question of why... Why do bad things happen to good people.

Have a great Christmas and happy holiday season!

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 45 - Confronting Grief During The Holidays

The holidays can be as stressful as we make them.

Even though the holidays can be stressful enough on their own, adding the stress of grief can sometimes make it unbearable. There are a few approaches to dealing with the holidays while grieving

  1. Spend the holidays alone. Maybe dealing with the loss during the holidays is too painful.
  2. Incorporate your loved on in your holiday. Make their favorite food or do their activity.
  3. Start a new tradition if incorporating old traditions are to painful.

Whatever you do, communicate with people just to let know what you're doing for the holiday... and don't judge anyone's decision to do... or not do what you think they ought to do.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 44 -Grief and the Facade of Happiness During the Holiday Season

Looks can be deceiving when grieving during the holidays

I've been reminded by watching a co-worker recover from a cold that we don't always look the way that we feel. While she appears to be well, you can hear the fact that she is still recovering in her voice which hasn't fully recovered.

I feel the same way when it comes to grief - I look fine, but sometimes that masks the way I truly feel.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)

Episode 43 - Experiencing Grief During the Holiday Sucks

One shouldn't have to bury a child... especially during the holidays

I have been going through a lot during the holiday season...

  1. Major eye surgery, from which I am on the road to recovery.
  2. I had a family member who was involved in a bus accident in Chattanooga, TN. They are also on the road to recovery
  3. I had a member of my Army family lose his teenage son in a freak accident.

I have rationalized why my father was taken from me as a means of making it easier to cope with his death. I can not, however, imagine having to bury my child. I don't think I could ever find an acceptableanswer to why this happens

This episode in dedicated to my brother in arms, Steve Hawks and the memory of his son, Ethan.

Hug someone during this holiday season and tell them that you love them... do it NOW, don't wait. Tomorrow isn't promised... but it should be if you're a kid.

Contact me using any of following:

email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com

twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief

web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

 

Music provided by Oren Levine (oren@ohljazz.com)